#11 Make space [ ]

Even when everything seems to be out of our control, there is one thing that will always remain ours...

the power to choose how we respond to our environment.

This is an insight and life lesson from psychiatrist, Holocaust survivor and author of Man's Search For Meaning, Viktor Frankl. 

"Between stimulus and response, there is space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor Frankl

When facing a crisis, there is no way to control the decisions of authorities, the lives of our neighbours, the economic repercussions, etc.

We can only control the way we choose to react to it.

However, we have a tendency to respond without thinking. We get carried away by emotions and the inertia of the experience.

In difficult moments we must become more conscious of our reactions.

As you have probably already experienced, this strange crisis is not only about a physical contagion, but an emotional and mental one as well.

Anxiety and stress can spread just as quickly.

We need to be more mindful of our thoughts, words and actions because they can genuinely have an impact on ourselves and those we influence. Be it family, friends and coworkers.

In other words, we need to create more "space" between the stimulus and response to be sure we contribute constructively.

How can you make more "space"?

A psychological hack you can implement now to regulate your emotions and be more mindful of your reactions is “self- distancing”.

It consists of momentarily stepping outside of yourself. Thinking of a problem as if it’s the problem of someone else to get a more detached and objective perspective. 

You can do this by *mentally* talking to yourself in the second or third person. 

"Why is Maria feeling this way?" vs "Why am I feeling this way?"

"Why are you worried about this?" vs "Why am I worried about this?"

By taking yourself out of the picture, you obtain a more holistic and rational view that allows for thinking alongside feeling. 

For more on "self-distancing" listen to this episode of "The Happiness Lab" by Yale professor Dr Laurie Santos.

The Takeaway: 

Adopt a marathon mentality.  

There is no clear indication of when this will end. But one thing is certain, this is not a sprint. Adapting to the "new normal" will take longer than we want. 

It's important to train our mind every day to build resilience and create the "space" needed to react appropriately and adapt as the situation develops. 

Try a stimuli diet.

Reading information and other stimuli like talking to family and friends are necessary. But too much can also lead to more stress and disinformation.

Focus on quality, not quantity. Instead of "panic scrolling" on social media be sure to curate your information from reliable sources at specific times of the day. 

If you find that certain stimuli are not helpful avoid them.

Let me know what you think. Hit reply.

If this Takeaway helped you share it with a friend.

You can find previous Takeaways here. 

Have a good week and stay safe!

María Albert